Did you ever notice that connecting with your kids can be difficult? They always have their devices and display a sense of annoyance toward their parents. Well let me share this with you, keep it up. They need us, they need to know we are here and we need to listen. By HS your chances to lecture are less and less but your instinct is to lecture more. This is not what our young people want or need. Offer love and try to listen. Connect on their level. In our home these are always in short supply, Amazon has a great sale on charge cords. A small cost and something that the kids love… Think about it, connect on their level. Wishing you all love and Happy Friday!
Do you have a passion? Something that burns inside of you, that you can not picture your world without? For me it is helping others, building community and sharing perspective. Two of my kids have an extreme passion for dance. My 13 year old lobbied hard for to change high schools to a performing art high school. After lots of discussion and auditions, the decision has been made she is moving high schools.
My 16 year old, who also loves dance, has a passion for space. She has said she wanted to be an Astro space engineer since she was little. She is still on that path and is beyond amazing at scheduling her intensive dance training and school to ensure fantastic grades and test scores. How does she do it? PASSION!
I have other kids in my life by choice that do not have passion. The day starts and ends without that spark of drive for something. Is it taught? Is it genetic? What causes the internal drive to motivate kids? I have NEVER had to tell a kid to do homework, to study for a test, or to do their reading. My two have always had that internal drive. It is there in their heart to push to exceed expectations.
Thought for today? Can passion be taught?
As a corporate executive I spend many hours working, traveling, attending meetings you know the drill. What I have found to be most difficult as a remarried executive is the difficulty with transition. I have witnessed kids having a hard time with transition between biological parents, but what is eye-opening is my own person experience with transition. The count down starts the day before, ok I am heading home tomorrow. Then the daily check in call to see what new drama has been discovered. With a family of eight and two former spouses, things are always crazy. In any event back to the transition. The anxiety sets in. How do I act when I get home? What domestic tasks have to be completed? How many hours until my next trip? My brain spins until the idea of going home to the blended family no longer seems appealing.
A friend told me once that we should only refer to the kids as kids, not step or his or hers. Ok that sounds great, but in my world the new family members are out to destroy my new marriage as well as create extreme moments of pain. So shall I say that some of the kid as are not happy for me to return from work. They seem to enjoy the trips to fun places, the materialistic needs, all as an entitlement. So you can see where the transition becomes one of great turmoil.
This has made me wonder how do some do it so well and why do others have such a hard time? Transition at work, personal transition, medical transition none of it is easy. Maybe that is the point?